Overnight Underground News May Seventh 2020

The Overnight Underground Podcast, now the headlines:

 Police using SWAT, pepper spray and knight sticks for social distancing. You won’t social distance, that’s a shooting. A Gun and knife fight battle winner in Florida. The Supreme Court flush and Trump’s butler did it. 

These stories & more coming up on today’s Overnight Underground News. I’m John Ford.  

Social distancing SWAT

In the US, the lockdown is definitely taking a toll and driving people and that includes the police, totally and completely nuts. Case in point: In Odessa, Texas the sheriff sent in a SWAT team to clear a protest outside a bar. The Bar, Big Daddy Zanes, was open despite going against the Governors order for bars, gyms and salons to remain closed. Bar owner Gabrielle Ellison speaking to KLBC TV. You know, you got to be careful or you could get “tooken”. 

Cops rough up non-social distancers

In New Jersey, Jersey City cops are under fire today for allegedly roughing up a group of black men for social distancing violations. Video has surfaced that shows a white cop repeatedly punching an African American man while another cop pins him to the ground. Police report six officers responded to a fight that involved somewhere in the neighborhood of a hundred people. Police used pepper spray and batons to break up the crowd and their heads. Social media finger pointers are saying the cops used excessive force to enforce social distancing and the PoPo is saying the cops used just  the right amount of force for the violent situation. Who you gonna believe? 

Social distance? That’s a shooting

All right, what’s next? In Oklahoma City on wednesday, two customers shot two McDonald’s employees after being told to leave the restaurant due to coronavirus restrictions. CNN reports the perps got angry and started shootin’ when they were asked to leave due to the plague restrictions. Two suspects were apprehended after fleeing the scene. The Hamburgler could not be reached for comment. 

Gun and knife fight winners

Well, we may finally have the answer to who wins in the knife fight, gun fight challenge. Two Tampa Mensa members may have finally answered the question, unfortunately one of them is dead. It seems two men were role playing the gun vs knife fight scenario when the gun went off, killing the knife wielding man. That’s Tampa prosecutor Anthony Falcone. According to Fox thirteen Tampa Bay, the shooter, twenty four year old Neil Gallagher, is facing manslaughter charges. His defense? He didn’t know the gun was loaded. 

Jogging will kill you

And of course there’s the case of the unarmed black jogger in Georgia who appears to be being hunted and is then shot and killed back in February. A video is causing outrage online. The two men in the video who allegedly shot and killed the jogger, Ahmaud Arbery, have not been charged. 

Supreme court flush

OK, enough of all that mayhem, here’s the sound byte of the day. Yesterday the Supreme Court heard oral arguments over teleconference, due to the dangers of coronavirus. Yet it seems that some of the better arguments came out the other end.  While attorney Roman Martinez was passionately arguing in Barr v. American Association of Political Consultants, listeners, and that includes everyone with an inclination to bend an ear due to the fact that the proceedings were streamed live on the internet, clearly heard a toilet flush in the background. Although Martinez was speaking at the time of the flush, it’s not clear who pushed the plunger. It could have been the notorious RBG, Aleto, Roberts, you name it. We hear from reliable sources that they are all, literally full of sh*t. In another ironic twist at the court, during arguments about robocalls, Justice Stephen Breyer was cut off when someone tried calling him. The Justice said, Quote: “I don’t think it was a robocall.” It was probably just Mark from Microsoft calling from Mumbai about all those infections on Breyer’s computer. 

Worse than Pearl Harbor

We actually have another candidate for sound byte of the day today on the Overnight Underground. President Trump on Wednesday compared the coronavirus pandemic to Pearl Harbor and nine eleven. Needless to say, a lot of Twatters were offended and outraged, because that’s just how they roll. The President also reversed his earlier decision to disband the coronavirus task force. He said he, quote: “had no idea how popular the task force is.” Probably more popular than his current ratings. 

The butler did it. 

The President’s personal valet has tested positive for Covid-19, but Trump and his docs say he’s A OK. The valets are members of the military and work closely with the President and and the first family. According to The New York Post and other sources, the valet started exhibiting symptoms on Wednesday and later tested positive for coronavirus. The news has reportedly, quote: “hit the fan” in the west wing. Nothing a good dose of bleach won’t fix. 

Avoid driving in Georgia

Here’s a reason to stay the hell off the roads in Georgia, twenty thousand teens have received their driver licenses without a road test.  It’s all part of Georgia’s way of handling the backlog of the thousands of road tests that have been put on hold due to the coronavirus pandemic. And while you’re at it, you might want to avoid driving in Wisconsin as week. The state announced that it will start doing the same for teen drivers, starting Monday. Oh these kids today, try parallel parking a ’70s Lincoln Town Car as part of your driving test and then get back to me. 

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