Overnight Underground News 02-14-2020

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Barr says Trump should stop tweeting. Mini Mike pays for Memes and calls Trump a carnival clown. Biden get bitchy. US military prepares for a pandemic while coronavirus mutates. A giant asteroid is approaching the earth and Amsterdam may ban pot and hooker tourism. 

This is the Overnight Underground, making news today: Barr says Trump should stop tweeting. Mini Mike pays for Memes and calls Trump a carnival clown. Biden get bitchy. US military prepares for a pandemic while coronavirus mutates. A giant asteroid is approaching the earth and Amsterdam may ban pot and hooker tourism. 

Hey, somebody should make a meme out of this. According to the BBC, Presidential hopeful and all around uber rich guy Mike Bloomberg is paying influencers to make meme’s. In his hope to reach younger voters, mostly because he can’t reach much of anything without a step ladder, Bloomberg is paying some of the internet’s top-viral creators to generate content to try and make Bloomberg squarepants appeal to the groovy hipster douchebags. Bloomberg has already spent over three hundred million bucks in his White House bid. Seems like it would just be cheaper to move to Austin or Brooklyn if you want to get in front of that hipster douchebag demographic. 

Bloomberg campaign pays influencers for memes

Democratic presidential candidate Mike Bloomberg is paying social media influencers to back him in the hope of reaching younger voters. His campaign has commissioned some of the internet’s top-viral creators to generate content about him that has reached tens of millions of followers.

Speaking of potential meme’s, there was tons o’ fun on the political Twittersphere Thursday. Let’s see, Trump called Bloomberg “Mini Mike, a five foot four inch mass of dead energy.” Bloomberg shot back and called Trump, “a carnival barking clown.” (byte) 

Donald J. Trump on Twitter

Mini Mike is a 5’4″ mass of dead energy who does not want to be on the debate stage with these professional politicians. No boxes please. He hates Crazy Bernie and will, with enough money, possibly stop him. Bernie’s people will go nuts!

Meanwhile Biden, According to Politico, told supporters on a phone call following his losses in Iowa and New Hampster, ‘I’ll be damned if we’re gonna lose this nomination.’ Talk about memes, old man yells at cloud. We asked the Joe Biden Insult bot, what’s up with that? Joe said, “Enough with that, you booger-pickin’ trollywag.” One on-line voter chimed in on Biden’s bid for the Presidency, saying “My dog would be a better president, and he barks at his own farts.” 

Mike Bloomberg on Twitter

@realDonaldTrump – we know many of the same people in NY. Behind your back they laugh at you & call you a carnival barking clown. They know you inherited a fortune & squandered it with stupid deals and incompetence. I have the record & the resources to defeat you.

James Carville and Bernie have been going at it for over a week now. First with Carville saying a Sanders match-up against President Trump would be quote,  “the end of days” for the Democratic Party and also referring to Sanders rabid supporters as quote, “a cult.” Sanders shot back on Anderson Cooper’s show on CNN (byte). You don’t expect it to stop there do you, of course not, Carville upped the slings and arrows responding to Bernie via a snapchat interview with former CNN reporter Peter Hamby. (clear throat) let me try my worst James Carville voice:  “That’s exactly who the f— I am! I am a political hack! I am not an ideologue. I am not a purist. He thinks it’s a pejorative. I kinda like it! At least I’m not a communist.” @BidenInsultBot

Biden on phone call: ‘I’ll be damned if we’re gonna lose this nomination’

Former Vice President Joe Biden – after his pair of devastating losses – tried to reassure supporters on an evening call Wednesday that “things haven’t changed” and that there’s been “no dropoff in our endorsers.” Arguing that the primary is “still wide open,” Biden said he was “confident we can win South Carolina.

You just can’t make this stuff up. 

OK everybody, panic. The US military is actively preparing for a coronavirus pandemic, according to the Military Times. The U.S. Northern Command is reportedly executing plans, maybe executing is not the best word to use there, to prepare for a potential pandemic. It seems there was an executive order issued by the Joint Staff and approved by Defense Secretary Mark Esper to initiate said pandemic plans. The orders include preparations for the possibility of widespread outbreaks. But citizens, don’t poop your pants just yet, according to Navy Lt. Cmdr. Mike Hatfield, at no time quote,  “does the planning indicate a greater likelihood of an event developing.” Sure, that’s exactly what you would expect them to say before the shit hits the fan. 

US military prepping for coronavirus pandemic

U.S. Northern Command is executing plans to prepare for a potential pandemic of the novel coronavirus, now called COVID19, according to Navy and Marine Corps service-wide messages issued this week.

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The word on the Chinese street is that the coronavirus is mutating, and ladies, gentlemen and everything in between, that’s not a good thing. According to the Express, experts have detected “striking” mutations in the pathogen’s genetic code, that could turn the virus “into something even worse”. Researchers are saying that despite the possibility of new mutations of the virus,  coronavirus mutations need to be further observed before any conclusions are drawn. Sure, that’s exactly what you would expect them to say before the shit hits the fan. 

Coronavirus MUTATES: New health concern as virus evolves into ‘striking’ new form

“Both point mutations and recombination promote host shift for coronaviruses.” The researchers pointed to frequent recombinations in the genetic material of SARSr-CoV – a progenitor to the deadly SARS-CoV outbreak of 2002 to 2003. Then, the epidemic was linked to a coronavirus strain carried by bats, which are also a potential source of the ongoing epidemic.

Some, shall we say, third teer news sites on the net are running a story quoting Chinese billionaire Guo Wengui, look I have no idea how to pronounce his name, with the billionaire claiming quote, ‘Over a million and a half people have caught coronavirus.” Wengui, says that the truth is that over fifty thousand people are dead from the virus, and that the Chinese government is covering up the extent of the plague. The official Chinese plague count is just under sixty five thousand inflected and thirteen hundred and eighty four dead. (byte)

Chinese billionaire: ‘Over a million and a half people have caught coronavirus’

Staff at funeral parlor wear protective suits to protect against the coronavirus in Wuhan Guo Wengui, a Chinese billionaire and one of China’s richest people, told the American Voice that the true numbers of those affected by the new coronavirus are much higher than what the Chinese government has been publishing.

Finally some good news, NASA says a giant asteroid is speeding towards earth, and if it hits, we won’t have to worry about politics or pandemic, cause we’ll all be screwed. Clipping along at around thirty four thousand miles per hour, NASA thinks the space rock will come close to earth on Sunday morning, but will miss us by a few million miles. Sure, that’s what you would expect them to say before the shit literally hits the fan. Currently the giant meteor 2020 campaign is in a  close primary race with world wide pandemic leading the pack, pandemic is getting a slight boost in the early apocalyptic caucuses and with Vegas oddsmakers. 

NASA Spots ‘Potentially Hazardous’ Asteroid Rapidly Approaching Earth – IGN

NASA has confirmed that an asteroid larger than the tallest man-made structure in the world is hurtling towards Earth at an incredible speed.

Amsterdam, it was fun while it lasted. The Daily Star reports that the city in Holland may lose some of the liberal policies that, well, made it worth visiting in the first place. Amsterdam is considering banning foreign tourists from buying cannabis and group tours of the red light district. The city’s mayor wants the bans to clamp down on tourism. I love it, clamp down on tourism. Most cities are trying to clamp down on drug use or prostitution, Amsterdam want’s to protect their drug use and prostitution from tourism. Wacky. Maybe next time, skip Amsterdam and head to Detroit for your legal weed. I’m sure they could use a tourist or two, to rob. And Vegas is loaded with hookers, at least that’s what I hear. 

Amsterdam to ban foreign tourists buying cannabis to slash overcrowding

Amsterdam could ban foreign visitors from buying cannabis in its famous coffee shops in an effort to reduce tourism. The city is struggling to cope with the huge numbers of people that flock there to take advantage of its tolerant drug policy – more than 17 million a year for a city with just 1.1 million permanent residents.

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Overnight Underground News 02-13-2020

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Coronavirus death rates soar, interest rates fall. The Senate clips Trump’s war-wings. Celebrity political endorsements are worthless. Utah labels porn. Deadly dumpster diving and the healthiest city in the US.

This is the Overnight Underground. Here’s the top stories today on the Underground: Coronavirus death rates soar, interest rates fall. The Senate clips Trump’s war-wings. Celebrity political endorsements are worthless. Utah labels porn. Deadly dumpster diving and the healthiest city in the US. 

Well here’s a news item that’s continuing to go viral. Either coronavirus will infect nearly two thirds of the world’s population or it’s going to peter out in a month or so. Take your pick. The New York Post consulted two experts, one who thinks we are all doomed and the other who thinks the whole thing will fizzle out by April. The way these experts agree on the outcomes of their science, are you sure they’re not climate scientists?

Expert warns coronavirus could infect 60% of world’s population

The coronavirus epidemic could grip about two-thirds of the world’s population if the deadly bug is not controlled, a top public health official said — as another expert predicted that cases in China could peak this month and fade away by April.

One piece of good news regarding coronavirus, CNBC reports that a mortgage refinance boom is continuing as coronavirus keeps interest rates low. If you’re going to refi, do it before the panic stops, cause it looks like once people stop dying from the virus, the interest rates will probably rise as the death toll drops. Unfortunately, the death toll skyrocketed in China in the last 24 hours, with more than 250 coronavirus deaths and over fifteen thousand new cases in one day.

For some crazy reason, it seems that no one is interested in going on cruises anymore. Gee you think it might be for the fact that you might just end up a prisoner in a cabin the size of your bathroom surrounded by people infected with the latest version of the plague? NPR is reporting that according to cruise ship industry professionals, bookings are down about forty percent in the industry. Maybe rebranding might help, something like…  Pathogen of the Seas, Carnival Parasite, Bacterium Britannia, HMS MIcrobe or maybe Princess Plague. 

Coronavirus Casts A Pall Over Cruise Industry At Height Of Booking Season

The Diamond Princess cruise ship has become a symbol of a global health nightmare. To date, 175 cases of the coronavirus – the infectious disease the World Health Organization is now calling COVID-19 – have been confirmed aboard the ship.

The Senate passed the war powers act, by a bi-partisan vote of fifty one to forty five. The passing of the bill will limit President Donald Trump’s ability to use military action against Iran, or Lichtenstein for that matter, without approval from Congress. Eight Republicans including Mike Lee, Rand Paul and Susan Collins voted in favor of the resolution. But come on, who’s kidding who? It’s just another law for Trump to ignore. 

Senate Passes War Powers Measure

Politics (Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images) The U.S. Senate voted Wednesday to advance a War Powers resolution which would limit President Donald Trump’s ability to use military action against Iran without approval from Congress. The vote was bipartisan, 51-45, with eight Republicans voting with Democrats.

We now have proof that celebrity political endorsements are a complete waste. That’s the scoop from Morning Consult, who polled over two thousand honest to god ‘mericans, and just under ninety percent of them said that a celeb endorsement wouldn’t change their mind on a candidate. One interesting take away is that the younger you are, the more likely you are to be influenced by a celebrity endorsement. Proving that today’s digerati chowderhead ankle-biters  are just as gullible as any other generation in the history of the world. But the celebrity influence is still as small as most of their IQ’s. Gen Z with only a 19 percent positive influence factor, Millenials are at sixteen percent, Gen X twelve percent and Boomers, well they really don’t give a shit, with only five percent saying a celeb endorsement would change their minds. So, listen up Hollywood. No one cares about your self inflated political opinions. All of you, right, left and in between, just go back to making movies and music and bite your lip the next time you’re inclined to inflict us with your vapid political pontifications. Because no one cares. Just be happy you have a career where you get paid more shekels than you really deserve for very little actual work. 

Nearly 9 in 10 People Said No Celebrity Endorsement Would Sway Their Vote

A Jan. 30-Feb. 1 survey of 2,200 U.S. adults found that over half (56 percent) of adults said they would be less likely to be a fan of a celebrity if he or she hosted a fundraiser for a candidate they did not support, up 6 percentage points from a July 2019 poll.

Hey, two days in a row with stories out of Utah here on the Overnight Underground. The Utah House committee has voted in favor of a porn labeling bill. Will they be scratch and sniff labels or just plain old sticky labels, only time will tell. The bill will require labels for pornographic material and if a warning label isn’t used, unlabeled porn, which is a no no,  will be liable for a twenty five hundred dollar fine. I wonder if they have to wear that special Mormon underwear in Utah porn?

You know how scuba divers shouldn’t dive alone, always dive with a dive buddy? Yea, it looks like that should be the case for dumpster diving too. The body of a 30-year-old woman who disappeared after a dumpster diving excursion has been found in the Greensboro, North Carolina landfill. According to the Burlington police department, Stephanie Cox had been trying to score dumpster treasure just after midnight and, well, didn’t make it out before the dumpster was emptied just before 2am. Dumpster diving, it seems,  has been picking up in popularity lately with what’s called the “Freegan” movement. Freegan’s compost food, dumpster dive and save money on expenses by living off the land as much as possible. One thing is for sure, this Greensboro Freegan sure reduced her carbon footprint in a hurry.  

Despite having streets littered with (sfx), San Francisco has been ranked as the healthiest city in the nation by WalletHub. Not the Department of Health, The Mayo Clinic or even your local podiatrist for god’s sake, WalletHub. Speaking of brown stuff (sfx), at the bottom of the list is Brownsville (sfx) Texas in 174th place, the worst place in America to hang your hat. Leaving San Fran, as a great place to hang your butt (sfx). This story was only included in today’s Overnight Underground so we could play the (sfx) sound effect. (sfx)

Wallethub Survey: San Francisco The Healthiest City In America

While the conditions of its street has drawn criticism, a new survey has found that San Francisco is actually the healthiest city in the United States when it comes to access to quality health care, parks to relax in, nutritional food to eat and the desire to stay fit.

A mostly correct and complete transcript, links to referenced sources and articles on today’s Overnight Underground can be found at John Ford dot net.

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Overnight Underground News 02-11-2020

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North Korea gets Coronavirus, Free Porn for Cruise Ship Virus Detainees, Bloomberg called Alleged Racist, Greta Thunberg Gets TV Show, Hookers for Jesus gets Government Grant and Weinstein set to close. 

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According to that bastion of journalism, the Daily Beast, coronavirus is kicking best Korea’s ass.  The article notes that the South Korean press is reporting that coronavirus is hitting North Korea hard, and that Kim Jung is so Ill he had to cancel a parade on Saturday, commemorating the anniversary of the founding of the country’s armed forces. No soldiers with giant hats parading with their massive missiles in downtown Pyongyang? It must be serious. The spread of the panic inducing disease to best Korea, according to the article, has caused North Korea to seal its northern border with China. Wait, when did it get unsealed? But take all of this with a grain of salt, I mean let’s face it, the Daily Beast is hardly a solid news source. Still, maybe just a tad more reliable than this year’s Iowa caucus.

North Korea’s Secret Coronavirus Crisis is Crazy Scary

SEOUL- North Korea’s not saying a word about deaths or illnesses from the coronavirus, but the disease reportedly has spread across the border from China and is taking a toll in a country with a dismal health care system and scant resources for fighting off the deadly bug.

One company is looking to lend a hand to the still quarantined coronavirus cruise ship passengers by giving them free porn. Fox Business News notes that CamSoda, the adult web site in question. is hoping to ease the boredom of the cruise ship isolationists, offering free porn webcam sessions. Giving new meaning to the phrase, “Going down with the ship.”

Free porn offered to quarantined coronavirus cruise passengers

The Miami-based porn site that tried to offer complimentary webcams to the Kansas City Chiefs and San Francisco 49ers last month is attempting to ease boredom for passengers stuck aboard Princess Cruises’ two quarantined vessels with free webcam sessions.

How is the New Hampshire primary going? It depends on who you ask. But as of today, the biggest loser isn’t even in the running in New Hampshire. Tearing up Twitter today, god I wish someone would tear up Twitter, is a 2015 audio recording of Presidential hopeful and all around rich guy Mike Bloomberg defending ‘stop and frisk,’ and throwing minority kids against the wall. (byte) Needless to say, it’s causing a lot of weeping, wailing and gnashing of teeth on the self righteous twittersphere. The Trump supporters will use this as ammo against Bloomberg and the intersectional cancel culture mob will undoubtedly weaponize this as part of their hate campaigns as well. Unless Bloomberg pulls off a media miracle, it looks like the great white billionaire hope is probably done. 

Bloomberg heard in 2015 audio clip defending ‘stop and frisk,’ throwing minority kids against wall: report

A newly-surfaced recording from a 2015 speech by Michael Bloomberg, in which the former three-term mayor of New York City gives a full-throated defense of the controversial policing procedure known as “stop and frisk,” is threatening to undermine the 2020 presidential candidate’s subsequent apologies for backing the policy and hurt his status with minority voters.

Serial scolder and climate cult commander Greta Thunberg is getting an extension to her fifteen minutes of blame. The BBC, in all of its infinite tv taxing wisdom, is giving the 17-year-old serial school skipper her own TV show. No release date has been announced, but hopefully it’s scheduled to air before the end of the world. Or not. 

Greta Thunberg to Get BBC Studios TV Series About Her Life

BBC Studios is making a TV show with 17-year-old climate activist Greta Thunberg. The project was announced at the BBC Showcase trade show on Monday. No network, release date or number of episodes have yet been set. Here is the description for the series, which comes from the studio’s science unit.

Where is your tax money going? Hookers for Jesus of course! The Department of Justice is ducking for cover after its been revealed that the government agency gave somewhere in the neighborhood of half a million dollars to Hookers for Jesus in an anti-human trafficking grant. According to the report from Newsweek, Hookers for Jesus is a Christian organization founded by a former sex worker. Maybe it’s completely legit, but the name Hookers for Jesus somehow reminds me of Springtime for Hitler. Is that a good or bad thing?

DOJ gave $500K grant to ‘Hookers for Jesus’ instead of established anti-trafficking groups: Report

The Department of Justice (DOJ) is under fire after a whistleblower complaint revealed that the department had given over $1 million in anti-human trafficking grants to two groups, Hookers for Jesus and the Lincoln Tubman Foundation, rather than highly recommended, established groups.

Sunday night’s Oscars ratings fell to an all time low, down about twenty percent from a year ago. But the real news for the glittering Hollywood elite comes out of New York, with former silver screen kingmaker or is it queenmaker, Harvey Weinstein’s rape trial set to wrap up early. The Guardian reports that the prosecution is expected to make closing arguments by the end of the week. Last week jurors got a peek at naked pictures of Weinstein so they could get a close up look at the Hollywood heavy’s allegedly odd genitalia. The photos, according to The Post, received assorted offbeat reactions from at least three of the jurors. Let’s face it, rancid, fried pork fat dipped in putrid lard have more sex appeal than Harvey Weinstein. 

Harvey Weinstein jurors shown naked photos of movie mogul

Manhattan jurors at Harvey Weinstein ‘s rape trial sat through some cringe-worthy testimony Tuesday before things really took a turn for the worse. Toward the end of the day, the panel was shown five nude photos of the portly, 67-year-old disgraced producer, presumably to help corroborate his alleged victims’ description of his odd genitalia.

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Overnight Underground News 02-10-2020

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New Hampshire Gloves Come Off, Coronavirus Panic Update, Oscars and Hollywood Alienate Milk Drinkers and Now get your Degree in Pot!

Here’s the latest from the Overnight Underground, 

Buttigieg is in the drivers seat in New Hampshire, wait can we say that on the radio, oh yea, we’re not on the radio, we can almost say any damn thing we want. Well, Pete won in Iowa, that part is official, so the presidential hopeful is the target of ire of all the other candidates as they tussle in New Hampshire. Joe Biden got caught in a moment of splender where he called a New Hampshire Voter ‘A LYING, DOG-FACED PONY SOLDIER’, whatever the hell that is. And the Hill says the chances of a brokered convention are inching closer where some dark horse candidate or, god forbid, we get stuck with Hillary again. Say it ain’t so. 

Biden Calls Skeptical New Hampshire Voter ‘a Lying, Dog-Faced Pony Soldier’

Perhaps the pressure is getting to him. On Sunday, Joe Biden snapped at a voter in New Hampshire, calling her a “lying, dog-faced pony soldier.” The dust-up came after the voter asked Biden, “How do you explain the performance in Iowa and why should the voters believe that you can win a national election?”

Coronavirius is still making headlines, with thousands finally being released from a cruise ship off Hong Kong after being given the all clear following testing. The quarantined cruise ship off Japan had diagnosed dozens of new coronavirus cases, including more ‘mercans. So what’s it like to be quarantined on a cruise ship? One passenger told CNBC, (byte) Sounds like a fun vacation.  China also just set the record for one day coronavirus deaths, inching toward the century mark for the first time, at 97. There are now over forty thousand confirmed cases. 

Thousands on cruise free to go after virus tests

Thousands of people stuck on a cruise ship in Hong Kong for four days have been allowed to disembark after tests for coronavirus came back negative. Some 3,600 passengers and crew on the World Dream ship were quarantined amid fears some staff could have contracted the virus on a previous voyage.

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‘Imagine being trapped in your bathroom’ – what it’s like on coronavirus-quarantined cruise ship

A California passenger aboard the Diamond Princess told CNBC on Monday it “can be a little bit depressing” when thinking about how much longer he and his wife must remain on the quarantined cruise ship: likely nine more days.

The Oscars, what can you say? A room full of rich white people, some of whom may or may not have some talent, being very sad and guilty for being white people. Just take Joaquin Phoenix for example. He won an Oscar for best something, and after watching his acceptance speech it appears that he was essentially playing himself in the film Joker. Can you really call “acting”  like an unhinged idiot in front of a camera, when it appears to come naturally, acting. (byte) I think what he’s trying to say here is that you are evil for drinking milk. I’m sorry, but Hollywood is just out of their fucking minds. Phoenix definitely wins the award for the most self righteous hollywood twit ever. As opposed to taking on big milk, maybe she should have taken on big pharma. Cause it looked to me like he needs to be on some serious meds. 

Brad Pitt’s Impeachment Nod to Iowa Caucus Quips: Oscars’ Most Political Moments

Gather hundreds of entertainment-industry types in a room and allow them speeches months before a presidential election, and discussion of politics is bound to ensue – as it did at Sunday night’s Academy Awards. The first political commentary of the evening came during Steve Martin and Chris Rock’s opening monologue, where Martin recalled the famous best picture category mishap in 2017.

Speaking of drugs, you can now get a degree in weed. Newsweek reports that Colorado State University-Pueblo will soon offer a sheepskin in cannabis. The course will be available for undergraduates looking to study the science needed to succeed in the cannabis industry, or who just want to get baked and good grades while attending college. What you got here is more future unpaid student debt for a useless degree, or as Bernie calls it, Monday. 

Degree in marijuana will be offered by Colorado university

Colorado State University-Pueblo is set to offer a “rigorous” degree in cannabis, winning state approval for the program on Friday. According to The Denver Post, the “Cannabis, Biology and Chemistry” course will be available for undergraduates wishing to study the science needed to succeed in the cannabis industry, starting this fall.

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